While We've Been Away Part 4: Abortions For Everyone!

You heard it. Now the entire of the United Kingdom and Ireland allow women to get abortions... Ish

In a bold move for women's rights everywhere, the suspiciously progressive Irish people voted in yet another referendum to allow women to get abortions.

Historically, Ireland has been ruled by the pope from his golden throne on Grafton Street with a golden fist but the people have risen up and decided that the church shouldn't really have a say in Politics.

Obviously, Northern Ireland is the hold out. Despite a female first minister, women's rights are non existent.
The Roman Catholic Church needs another country to oppress so perhaps it's time for a Vatican/DUP team up!

While We've Been Away Part 3: Gay Marriage in the ROI

In an absolutely shocking turn of events, they had a referendum in the south to allow gay marriage. Obviously we all assumed that they'd manage to get enough write in votes to deport the gay people back to Holland or some other gay country but no.
People turned out en mass and now everyone can get married!
Men and women, men and men, women and women. And of course man can now marry beast as that was one of the stern warnings given to us by God pre referendum.

Whats next Ireland, abortions for everyone??

Garth Brooks Concerts Cancelled - A Country In Mourning

Country and Western singer Garth Brooks threw his toys out of the pram today when Dublin City Council refused to allow 2 of his 5 scheduled gigs to go ahead. In a statement, Brooks said "it's all or none" in an attempt to get his money salvage the shows. 

The problem has occurred due to an agreement that the local residents have with Croke Park stating that only 3 non sporting events a year can be held in Croke (which was put in place to placate locals when major redevelopment works began that caused significant disruption).

After One Direction played 3 nights earlier this year, the original 3 night run of Brooks' tour doubled the allowed events but no complaints were made.

Once the fourth and fifth nights were added, local residents threatened legal action (on the 14th of February) so this sudden and entirely unexpected turn of events have ruined the lives of 400,000 'music fans' who won't get to see the shows.

There's still a small chance the shows will go ahead, but in the mean time Bono is flying home from his private island in some tax haven somewhere to bring peace and calm to the Irish people.

Peace Be With You