British Government regretting the whole "Northern Ireland" thing.

The British Government have finally admitted that they may have made a mistake in the whole "Northern Ireland" thing.

Theresa May made a full statement to the commons which we have transcribed below

"I think it's time to finally admit that a mistake was made. Our ancestors invaded Ireland in the 1200s and we regret that. In 1921 we chose to partition the North from the South and it is a decision we deeply regret now. We are sorry to the people in England who wanted to leave the EU that Northern Ireland is really screwing the whole thing up. We bought their Westminster representatives but despite that, we face resistance at every turn for our plans to completely destroy the British Economy.
We are sorry and we humbly request that Ireland take them back. Please"

We are still waiting on a statement from Irish PM Leo Varadkar but early reports suggest that his statement will largely consist of snickering and gestures. 🖕